Back in SF after a spin around Florida. Visited family, friends, and fish.

In Gainesville, I started at home for a few days with family. My nephew is 14 years old now. And taller. Much taller. He'll very likely be looking down on me in a few years.

Next, I went to Tampa and stayed in the pinkest girlie pink room you have ever pink set your pink eyes on pink. And pink. Rachel very kindly let me stay in her pink palace, since the family had a full house over Labor Day weekend, and the guest room was full.

Did I mention pink?

Thanks again, Rachel!

There was more than just pinkness. Francine, Rachel, and I went for a stroll by one of Tampa's park/piers.

It was like a little taste of the South Florida I used to know, with mangroves and these little purple flower heads we used to pop off the stem with our thumbs, chanting "Momma had a baby and her HEAD popped off!"

Children not named Rachel are gruesome.

Next up, I drove to Miami to pick up Z-Man. This was an unfortunately stressful part of the trip. I'm an experienced, seasoned Florida driver, which means I've basically driven through hurricanes and on I-95. However, this trip down the west coast saw some of the worst rain and visibility I've ever had to deal with. Happily, my fellow drivers were all being impressively sane, driving slowly, lights on, and even hazards blinking. I could mostly follow behind, although at one point, there was no one in front of me, and trying to find the road was a bit terrifying.

But that's not all. After the storm cells passed, I was in the flat part of I-75 that goes through the Everglades. Rain stirs up insects, which the tiny native Everglades birds love to eat. This means that for the next 17 miles, I had suicidal/homicidal hungry birds dive-bombing the road in front of me, trying to get their fill of bugs. Of the 193 close calls, one bird will not be passing on its genes. I said a little kaddish.

I was very glad to be in Coral Gables at the Biltmore, honestly one of the finest hotels I've ever stayed at. Z-man and I could probably make a vacation just there, doing nothing. Gorgeous, fantastic service and amenities, and check out my view.

We were only there for 2 days, and both pretty exhausted. We didn't do anything the first day, and the second night, I braved a trip over to South Beach.

It's still pretty, but it didn't quite have the same vibe that I remembered (although still keeping up a good level of douchiness). I'm probably just old now.

These are a bit blurry, but they're for my sister.

Then after a much more relaxing, uneventful trip down US-1, we made it to Key West!

One night, Z-Man and I took a sunset cruise out over the water. Gorgeous day, as you can see.

Hoist them thingies!

This is the Western Union, another schooner with whom our ship, the Jolly II Rover, has a friendly rivalry of sorts.

Hello, Mallory Square!

Ah, there's the sun. Wonder if we should worry about that haze...? Nahhh.

A shipmate "priming" his "cannon." Commence innuendo.

Ahhh, look at that water. Hope those clouds'll get out of our way.

Oh, look over there! Much nicer! Fort Zachary Taylor, everyone! Pretty!

(I posted a few panoramic shots, which get kinda scrunched up, like this one)

The Western Union attempts to engage the Jolly II Roger. Boy, sea battle is really slow.

Fire cannons!

Ha! We chased off those yellow dogs! Yearrr! Take that, ya bilge-suckers! You're a . . . you're . . . hey, where are you going?

Oh, crap!

It was at this point, the crew of the J2R hauled ass to get the rigging down, and then we hauled ass back to port. Look at those skies!

At that point, it commenced raining with tropical vengeance. I wasn't particularly alarmed that I'd be paying Davey Jones a visit (no, not the Monkey, nor the Bowie). The seas were much frothier, and there was some spectacular lightning, but it was quite a show, and it was quite something to see. Sunsets happen every night, but how often do you get caught in the middle of a genuine Carribbean squall? Totally worth it.

The next day we opted for some sunshine and another boat ride, gluttons for punishment that we were. I've never been to Bahia Honda before, and I'd heard that it's supposedly a first-class beach. I'm happy to report it easily lived up to this reputation.

We took a snorkeling expedition from Bahia Honda to Looe Reef, named after an English sailor who had to ran aground on it. Another boat ride, but this one much less eventful from the ride standpoint, although at one point a silly tourist lost his hat in the water. The crew kindly fished it out, but did so not realizing when we'd turned about, we'd tangled a lobster trap buoy around the propeller of one of the engines. Z-Man and I were in the back, and I saw the buoy first and let the captain know. He was much more concerned that it was an engine problem, so when it turned out to be this, there was much relief. He sent in his mate to cut it free and we were on our way.

Unfortunately, beautiful as the reef was once we got there, we were beset by moon jellyfish. Not the worst kind (like a box jelly), but not fun to be around. They'd apparently had a fertile year, and were much worse earlier in the summer. Sea turtles eat them, which is another reason you should like turtles.

Jellyfish pretty much just go with a current, so once I figured out which way they were coming and which way they were headed, it was a bit easier to dodge them, but it still was like Hartsfield Airport during rush hour. Z-Man, brave little trooper that he was, lasted less than two minutes. He was a little freaked out at being surrounded by so many fish, and he felt like he wasn't strong enough a swimmer to avoid the jellyfish. We'll have to start somewhere simpler for him, like, say, our bathtub.

I don't have any good pictures from the boat or dive, not wanting to risk my camera, but we did walk around the park a bit more before leaving. The bridge you see in some of the pictures is what remains of the old Flager Railroad that ran down to Key West. A hurrican wiped it out of usability many years ago, and Flagler couldn't rebuild it. It became the foundation for one of the earlier traffic roads to Key West until the new US-1 was built.

Well, it's our last day (already!) and my birthday. So we decided to try a sunset viewing one more time, from land.

The sunset was a bit later than we'd figured, and we had reservations at Hot Tin Roof. Fortunately for us, they had one more outside table for 2 available that overlooked the western sky, albeit the sun would set behind Sunset Key, a private island just off Key West.

So brace yourself for a ton of Sunset pictures . . . now!

Dessert was location-appropriate: Key Lime pie! Anyone who knows me knows that my #1 choice for dessert will always be chocolate and none of your funny white stuff. However, my #2 favorite dessert of all time is Key Lime pie.

This was my first actual pie of the trip, and it was delicious (the palm tree is cinnamon powder). Previously, we'd gone to La Te Da for Key Lime "martinis." I use the scare quotes because, like the snob I am, a martini is gin and vermouth and that's it. But I also acknowledge we're stuck with the term for anything else, and I've made my peace with it. It's especially easy, because La Te Da makes hands-down the best Key Lime pie martini anywhere, ever. All of the bartenders insist it's the Licor43 liqueur they use. It's kind of like Tuaca, without the awful. It's incredibly smooth, to be sure, but in my opinion, theirs is so good because they use just a tiny bit of cream, and the cocktail glass is rimmed in powdered graham cracker. That, and the fact that they make enough for multiple pours, which they strain off into a small cruet that they rest on a bowl of ice to keep it cool. We enjoyed them several nights in lieu of actual dessert or pie, but on my full moon birthday night, at 41 years of age (and seeing my first damn age spots on my hands), only the real thing would do. And it did.